I posted a while back about how I get to be a bridesmaid in my friend Natalie’s fast-approaching wedding. She and her fiance, Colby, have opted to go the more traditional route with a Catholic ceremony, which, as you may or may not know, comes with certain caveats. The bridal party can’t show too much skin (curse my amazing rack!), and the bride and groom have to attend marriage classes (which don’t sound too bad), and natural family planning classes (which sound amazing).
Natalie received this in one of said classes:
It speaks for itself.
She very dutifully forwarded it to me, which I appreciate, as I am currently cohabitating with someone. I never had any idea how dangerous this could be, as apparently our lethal experiments with artificial reproductive technologies (I’m trying to make Caleb an electric uterus in our garage laboratory) will lead to crime, devastated children and euthanasia. Yep, that totally makes sense. My favorite part is how they list all the different kinds of contraceptives. That’s not going to prevent me from having sex, that’s just going to give me ideas.
If they really want an image to deter people from living together, I submit the following:
The face of pre-marital sex.
Also harrowing:
That’s right kids, I have crabs, and my boyfriend is perpetually being eaten by a shark. That’s what happens when you live in sin. And also what happens when you find yourself in a half-off card shop with nothing better to do.
